#7 Expect NOTHING

Assalamualaikum and hello dear people! Merry Christmas to everyone's celebrating, may you receive all the bliss in this season.

I am now waiting for my processor to transfer all those 2000+ items from my phone to my laptop  bcs my phone memory is full! Again! Living a life as someone who loves to vlog and capture everything is tiring... i mean when it comes to transferring all the files again and again, not when recording them videos lol. I just love keeping things on record so I can re-watch and somehow relive in that moment. It became a meaningful event instantly, you couldnt feel as such at present time but it feel precious when you watch it say a couple of months later.


Oh right, in this post I'd like to talk about people. Not about any particular person, rather how to have control in yourself when dealing with other people.

Things you MUST BURY IN YOUR MIND:

1) You CAN'T control how people perceive you, you cant change their thought.

2) You CAN NEVER please everyone.

3) People will never truly understand you (as you understand your own-self).

4) You can't force people to behave how you want.

5) People will always hurt you.

6) HUMAN IS ALWAYS and FOREVER WILL BE IMPERFECT.



Having said all these, you have to control your expectation on people because you only have control on yourself, not on other people.

If you expect people will think you're worth, or your idea is brilliant then you have violated RULE NO 1.

If you think that, after you have worked so hard, giving your best but people just never give you credit ; 2).

If you are in a very misfortune event, and people just couldn't understand that and you think it is unfair, well, 3).

You have a little brother, they behave very differently like how you pleased, your brother didn't want to go to a good school you suggested because they are just different than how you want them to be, read 4) please.


You face rejections, disapproval, mean remarks from people because people will always hurt you in every possible way.

And above all, remember that YOU do exactly the same to other people :'))) because you are human too!

Since you cant change all that, you can minimize the impact of all these by empowering yourself. Control your mind** to not being toooo sensitive.

Ah look who's talking.

I used to be sooo sensitive, i took every words deeply. Even more the demeaning ones, i kept it within myself and let the wound opened, replaying them in my mind, allowing the wound to keep on bleeding that it consumes my soul. But that was when i was in my teenage years (eh masih teenager kayh, okla young adult sounds more appropriate xD) and I was a very hotheaded girl before pfft no one dares to piss me off bcs its like trying to prompt a volcano eruption haha sorry everyone yang cuak w mee (padan ah kena jadi ajk disiplin block suatu ketika dahulu uhuhu)

BUT!

 I am a BRAND NEW PERSON NOW! Alhamdulillah 'ala kulli hal. Changes are possible, you just have to try harddd! I am now in the pursuit of being a better version of me every single day, giving my best to be the best version of myself yay.

Dulu people call me akak bekeng, now my friends even my yseali friends label me as the most calm person haha I hardly get angry (real marah, feeling despised tu ada la but they never consume me) these past 2 years i'm even more in disbelief how I could change 180 degrees.

One time my indonesian friend told me

"Syafi, I've been thinking how unique your team is"

"Enlighten me"

"I mean, one person is a very perfectionist, another one is very playful and you! Always so calm and chill"

"That's exactly how we manage to come this far as a team" (though it is not easy AT ALL)



The point i'm trying to make is that, mind power could even cure temper problem! (though I did many other things to overcome the hotheaded me)

Coming back to my main topic, always expect nothing in people. Expectations are happening in your mind so its all about the power of your mind.

 Expect that people will not like you, expect that they won't accept you, expect that they will throw mean things at you, expect that they are different than what you want, expect that they don't know how to do the work you asked them to do, expect NOTHING.

So, when they do pleasant things, you'd be way delightful because you had no expectations to begin with from them.

For example in a friendship, if you expect your friends to always be there during your hard times and it turns out they just couldn't do that. You are going to be feeling resentful, sad, mad and disappointed all at once because you HOPED that your friends would do that for you. Pero mi amigo, i'm sorry to say that this might happen to you so you might wanna work on your mind power before your heart is going to be shattered into pieces.

Or you expects your family to always understand you because you are from the same blood. The people that you've been since birth. There will be times when even family could disappoint you because they are simply human. They might not agree with your choices or do not understand why you make such decision -- its okay, even if they are your family. Do not be in dismal,

"Even my family couldn't understand me, then who do I've got to turn into?"

Accept the fact that even your family could hurt your feelings too bcs we are all simply flawed.

But hey here's the GOOD NEWS,
know that Allah will never disappoint you
*wink*

So.

Before your mind controls you, start controlling your mind, now.

**I started to have a grip on myself when I read the book by Tony Robinson which is "Awaken the Giant Within" (its about how powerful the mind is, and how you can actually control them)